The Gameplan...

"But I, with a song of thanksgiving, will sacrifice to you. What I have vowed I will make good. Salvation comes from the LORD." [Jonah 2:9, NIV]

How awesome would it be to see world class doctor's bow down and worship our Heavenly Father tomorrow morning for His miraculous healing, signs and wonders in Jackson's life? It is not a matter of can He...but Will He? And I can honestly say - I don't know! I don't know how God will perfectly work out His divine and holy purposes in Jackson tomorrow morning - but He will! And Kel and I are ready to go - and our heart's cry out that tomorrow morning all would know that God is our Healer and that Salvation comes through His Son - Christ Jesus alone! And so tonight...with a song of thanksgiving - we surrender Jackson to our Heavenly Father's Sovereignty!

It has been quite a month - and I can't believe that it has been 25 days since I last wrote! But as promised...I will write when felt led to do so! The last three weeks have been intense, and full of God's miraculous blessings! We still can't believe that we are living in this beautiful home! It is more than anything we ever could have imagined! And you want to talk about the demonstration of God's Love and support...I can't begin to tell you how many "man and woman" hours have been put in over the last three weeks by our amazing friends and family to help turn this house into a home! And to see the Hand of God move through them has been one of the greatest blessings I have ever witnessed - and tonight...it definitely is home!
The move was as perfect as one can be - and to be back in "community" with our church family literally two minutes away is indescribable! As we traveled over the last day from the farm...Carter said. "daddy - does this mean our vacation is over?" Vacation! Are you kidding me...that was no vacation - but talk about an awesome time of preparation and growth individually and as a family! Our God is an awesome God - and I will ever shout praise for the ways in which He united and developed this family through our time in the "wilderness"!
And oh how the many opportunities to "Be Still" and dig into His Word have powerfully moved over the last several weeks! Being very transparent...there has been some honest doubt over the last three weeks, and the enemy has been on the attack! And we are absolutely exhausted! Scheme after scheme has been brought - and yet here we are standing in our Heavenly Father's Strength and peace hours away from Jackson's birth! This is the night that we have been waiting for through so many sleepless nights...and I can't begin to share all the emotion! I feel like I am graduating high school or college all over again! Better yet...the night before our wedding! You remember the emotions you experienced in those moments...so excited, proud, pumped, anxious, nervous, and yet scared to death! Or maybe that is just the first born coming out again...but that is where we are tonight! Every emotion possible I think we have experienced in the last three days or are experiencing right now! We are ready to go...with all eyes on Jesus!

The gameplan:
Tomorrow morning, Monday - November 30th - Kelly will deliver Jackson by c-section at Magee Women's Hospital. He will immediately be stabilized in Magee's Neo-natal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) and as soon as he is able, will be transferred to Children's Hospital where he will be stabilized, observed and evaluated for several days. After meeting with Dr. Merrell - (Jackson's Pediatric Cardio-vascular Surgeon) last week, at this point everything is on the table regarding his care and surgical plan. Dr. Merrell and his staff want to give Jackson's left ventricle all the time they can for it to demonstrate its functionality and effectiveness to sustain life. They are prepared for the worse surgical course of action (the Norwood series of surgeries), but are not ruling out another angioplasty balloon or valve(s) replacement surgery. It truly is up in the air as to what/when/how God will move! But - we trust that He will reveal His plan and course of action for Jackson! And we continue to plea and cry out for God's super-natural, divine healing! Hey - Christ waited for two days to raise Lazarus from the dead...who knows what He has planned! But we do know that He is by our side and that His Word is a lamp unto our feet! He will be with us hour by hour, step by step - and even though our desire is for a huge flood light that will light up the landscape and dangers 500 yards around us...we embrace and stand on His promise of a lamp!

And so tonight...stand with us and Praise Him! Sing a song of Thanksgiving...and surrender to His Will! He can, has and will continue to move mountains - part waters - deliver us from evil - and forever shower us with His Seriously Ridiculous Love!

With all eyes on Jesus...let us walk through fire!

Walking through fire...

But now, thus says the LORD, who created you, O Jacob, And He who formed you, O Israel: “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; You are Mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; And through the rivers, they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned, nor shall the flame scorch you. For I am the LORD your God, the Holy one of Israel, your Savior!" [Isaiah 43: 1-3, NKJV]


Jackson Update:
Last week Kelly brought me a thought from one of Karen Kingsbury's latest books entitled Summer that will forever change my perspective and posture when praying through storms of life. It was a prayer so simple, but foundational in our faith for the journey that we are walking through: "Doug, let's pray that God would make clear the lines between wanting a miracle and walking through fire!"


Do we believe that the Lord our God can and will heal Jackson? ...without a shadow of a doubt!
Do we want a miracle from our Heavenly Father? ...you better believe it!
Have we pleaded with our Savior for one? ...absolutely!
Is God calling us to walk through fire? ...it seems so!


Wednesday was a day that will forever change the landscape of our family - as if the last 5 months haven't drastically done so already! It was a day that forever will be engraved on our hearts with great disappointment, pain and sorrow - but surrounded in absolute Peace and Strength from our Heavenly Father! The tears tell the story and the broken heart shares the journey! But we will stand...with hands raised high, and hearts surrendered for we know that to continue walking by Faith we must Trust and Obey! Why would we turn our backs now on the One who perfectly formed and created Jackson? He is perfectly and wonderfully made - and even though from our human perspective we see the devastation of a defect, God divinely sees the pursuit of His purpose...and we will surrender, lay down our lives and follow Him through this this fire!


The echo cardiogram and ultrasound confirmed that the left side of Jackson's heart has stopped developing at this point. The worst scenario of a hypo-plastic left heart the doctor's shared with us early July has become a reality! There is no squeeze, and even though the Fetal Aortic Balloon surgery on July 24th was "technically successful" the desired outcome of a bi-ventricle heart does not seem to be realized. And after the intense and very "real" conversations with Dr. Emery, Dr. Speer, Dr. Sherman and Dr. Vatz...and as the disappointment filled our eyes with many tears...plans were developed for the series of surgeries - known as the Norwood procedure - to begin a few days after Jackson's birth. In the words of Dr. Emery..."we did not hit a grand slam, and for this I am very sorry!"
The news broke us...and thus the reason for the delay in writing! But, I can't begin to tell you how amazing our wise counsel, community of encouragers and team of doctors are - you want to talk about incredible care, support and encouragement! Our doctors have been - and will be - rocks of wisdom and encouragement as we walk through a very intense storm to save Jackson' life! It seems that God is going to work a miracle through the hands, minds and hearts of this incredible team of men and women to save a life that truly has transformed ours - even in the womb! We don't know how He will do it...but we trust that He will heal Jackson! He may not cure him the way we want, but Christ is our Savior, Healer and Redeemer - and we place our Hope and Trust in Him!
To be honest...I can't wait to see how the Lord works all this out! I know that even though we walk through this very dark valley - that our Savior has gone before us! He is by our side! He is faithful! He is Love! And His mercies are new every morning! He has made clear the lines, but He is not limited by our circumstances! He can move this mountain and I believe that He will in ways that will continue to shock and awe us all!


So what are we going to do....we are going to Praise Him with Great Thanksgiving! Our hearts echo that of Paul's found in Ephesians 1, that "All Praise be to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ. Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure. So we praise God for the glorious grace he has poured out on us who belong to his dear Son. He is so rich in kindness and grace that he purchased our freedom with the blood of his Son and forgave our sins. He has showered his kindness on us, along with all wisdom and understanding!"
We will stand and Praise Him for the Glorious Grace He has poured out over us! So many in this world are crying! Striving to earn grace! Looking for love! Searching for answers! Is He not enough? Where will we go...where will we run? To Him - for He is by our side whenever we fall! He is there in the dead of this darkness! Please don't fight His Hands that are holding us! Oh how He Loves us! And He wants you to know that He will never let you go! God never said it would be easy...but He promised it would be worth it!

So here is how the "fire" seems to be lining up...

November 30th or December 1, Kelly will deliver Jackson by c-section at Magee Women's Hospital, where he will be stabilized in the NICU and transferred to Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh as soon as possible. Jackson will then undergo a few days of testing, evaluation and preparation before the first surgery to begin by-passing the left side of his heart at 3 or 4 days of age. He will then be stabilized and monitored in the Cardiac Neo-natal Intensive Care Unit at Children's Hospital for 3 to 4 weeks following surgery. Most likely Jackson will not be home before January 2010 with weekly visits to follow at Children's hospital, until the second surgery at 3 or 4months. At this point an extended plan of care will be established before the third surgery between 2 and 3 years old.

Obviously this is going to be a very long road, and intense fire to walk through! We are not sure all that we will face, nor the emotion we will experience, but when we are discouraged we will let our heads lead our hearts by the Promise of Isaiah 43..."When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned, nor shall the flame scorch you. For I am the LORD your God, the Holy one of Israel, your Savior!" [Isaiah 43: 3, NKJV]

Move Update:

This week is going to be a very intense week in its own right as we will be moving into the new house in Wexford, PA. Tomorrow we will be finalizing plans with Kevin and Beth and signing the lease agreement after church. They are scheduled to move out on Monday, and then we will begin moving in Tuesday evening. Thursday morning, the moving company will be unloading all of our belongings that have been in storage over the last 4 months! [Praise God...we will finally be able to stop wearing flip flops, even though this coming week will be "spring like"!]

Please continue to reinforce the foundation of prayer! Trust me - your prayers are felt and there is no way that we would be standing if were not for the demonstrations and expressions of encouragement, faith and support you all have shown through our Heavenly Father! We love you all so much and thank you for standing and walking through this storm with us!

Keep the faith...Keep it real...and Keep your eyes on Jesus!

You read my mind...

"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God!" [Hebrews 12:2, NIV]

You know...the testing of your faith develops perseverance! That is the promise of James 1:3 - and today, we are ready to run! And we ask that you run this race with us! Run the race of faith - allowing your faith and actions to work together so that others might see the Love, Grace and Pursuit of our Heavenly Father in their lives! Your Faith is of greater worth than gold, for even gold will be destroyed when refined by fire - but not our faith in Christ Jesus! Jesus is the author and perfecter of our faith, and Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls. [1 Peter 1:8-9, NIV]

We have suffered much through the many trials we have faced in this time of His refining fire...but today - with great joy - we rejoice! Today is the day...and by faith we step out! With the overwhelming peace and strength of our Savior, we persevere!

Please be in prayer today for our appointments with Dr. Emery, Dr. Sherman, Dr. Speer and the neo-natal teams of Magee Women's and Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh! Don't know what we will learn today...but we pray for the wisdom, knowledge, peace, grace and strength to Praise Him no matter what unfolds! Lord - we continue to pray for a miracle...and that through this...those hurting and broken in our world might come to know you and find the great joy we have in Your Unfailing Love! We love you Lord - and we thank you for your incredible blessing in our lives! Here we go...

All Eyes on Jesus!

Once Again...

But once again...I say amen and it's still raining!
As the thunder rolls, I barely hear You whisper through the rain, "I'm with you"! And as Your mercy falls I raise my hands and praise the God who gives and takes away!
I'll praise you in this storm, and I will lift my hands for You are who You are no matter where I am! And every tear I've cried You hold in your hand, You never left my side and though my heart is torn...I will praise you in this storm!
[Mark Hall, Casting Crowns, Praise You In This Storm]

Praise the Lord! For it is good to sing praises to our God, for He is gracious and lovely; praise is becoming and appropriate...
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds! He determines and counts the number of the stars; He calls them all by their names. Great is our Lord and of great power; His understanding is inexhaustible and boundless. The Lord lifts up the humble and downtrodden; He casts the wicked down to the ground. Sing to the Lord with thanksgiving; sing praises! [Psalm 147:1-11, Amplified Bible]

"Why, daddy? Why is Jackson's heart not working right?"
"Bubba, I don't know - why? But God does, and Jackson is in His hands!"
"I know daddy, but Jesus gives us a new heart and He can just reach over and touch him and make his heart better!"

Oh, to have faith like a child! Talk about breaking your heart...especially when those big blue eyes look up at you for guidance, encouragement, wisdom and insight! But this is just one highlighted of our conversations with Carter over the last week or so, as he is so concerned, compassionate, and loving and if you want to talk about a prayer warrior – our little man has laid quite the foundation of prayer for his little brother! But, please don't miss the wisdom in Carter's words! Don't miss the promise that Carter spoke of found in Ezekiel 36...

"I will sprinkle clean water on you, and you will be clean; I will cleanse you from all your impurities and from all your idols. I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws." [25-27]

The Promise is a new heart and a new spirit! Removing our old hearts of stone and giving us one that is full of life! And this is our prayer as we head into a day full of appointments with our team of doctors and the neo-natal teams of Magee Women's and Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh...we don't know the outcome - but God has gone before us, and His comprehension, understanding, love, mercy, faithfulness, care and compassion are inexhaustible and boundless! And we believe that He can and will heal Jackson's heart...how...don't know! But He is God - and we will leave that up to Him!
And we will continue to praise Him for who He is! We will praise Him because of what He did on the Cross of Calvary - where He gave His one and only Son...why? Because He loved us so much! He has washed us clean! Set us free, apart and holy! And praise Him for His Amazing Grace that saved us because we believe in our heart and confess with our mouth that He is Lord! [Romans 10:9]

So..."why daddy?" is a question that we won't ask! We don't need to know the "why"...because we trust: That He is who He said He was, is and forever will be! That He is, was and will be Totally Victorious! That He defeated death when He rose again! That we can put our hope, future and life in His hands - because He is Love! He is our Refuge! He is our Strength! He is our Peace! He is life...full and abundant! And so many times we get caught up in the "details", the "whys" and the "hows" of it all...but I ask that you put that hammer down with me! Trust that He has this totally worked out according to His purposes! And yeah, it is still raining! The thunder continues to roll, and it is tough to hear Him whisper in the wind through the rain....but He is with us!

Tomorrow is huge...and we are excited to be able to share the story of God's incredible work - so stay tuned! And get to singing ya'll! Praise His Name!
And remember...
"the LORD delights in those who reverently and worshipfully fear him, who put their hope in his unfailing love!" [Psalm 147:11]

We love you...and All Eyes on Jesus!

Mile 12

This is what the Lord says:
“Cursed are those who put their trust in mere humans, who rely on human strength and turn their hearts away from the Lord. They are like stunted shrubs in the desert, with no hope for the future. They will live in the barren wilderness, in an uninhabited salty land.
“But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence. They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green, and they never stop producing fruit." [Jeremiah 17: 5-8, NLT]

The first weekend of Kelly and my engagement is one that we will never forget and truly transformed our relationship forever...

I had traveled to Clarion from Hershey, where I was teaching high school mathematics at the time, to spend the weekend with Kelly and her family. It was a weekend that had been highlighted on the calendar for months, and one that will be highlighted in our marriage forever!
Kel had trained throughout the fall of 2001 and straight through the heart of winter in preparation of the annual Clarion River Half-Marathon that took place the first weekend in April. And let me tell you - Kel was in phenomenal shape! She was one lean, 'not very mean', runnin machine who was so excited about the 13 miles of grueling pavement, twists, turns and hills! And as you can see/imagine - this guy did not see the purpose or reason for the excitement surrounding a two-hour run, let alone the two mile runs during my middle school cross country days...but Kel was pumped, and I was there ready to cheer my bride on!
It was a beautiful, crisp start to the race around 8am, but as the morning grew older - it grew colder! First it was the wind, followed by a huge drop in temperature, and then the snow began to fly! A marathon takes its toll on any runner...but the fierce intensity of the bitter, cold air that morning took a huge toll on all that gathered - especially the racers!
As the first few runners crossed the finish line - it was not a pretty sight! Runner after runner immediately sought care and relief for their sore, bright red skin that had just taken the full brunt of a spring snow storm! And when my cousin Sara [one of Kel's best friends, and the person responsible for setting Kelly and I up on our first "blind date"] crossed the finish line an hour and a half into the race frozen and desperate for some warmth, I began to get worried - as there was no sign of Kelly. I knew Kelly was not feeling 100% that morning as she prepared for the run, and as I stood there frozen to the core in my hat, gloves, boots, winter jacket, and long underwear...I could only imagine the struggle and adversity Kelly was facing after an hour and forty-five minutes of the grueling race - not to mention in the grip of of a storm.
So...after talking with Sara for a few minutes, my gut told me it was time to go! I started walking the race backwards! After walking the first half mile and still no Kelly in sight, I began to jog the race backwards! And with a half-mile job under boots, I hit the "mile 12" marker...and that is when my gorgeous bride-to-be appeared, cresting over a small hill...but it was not a pretty sight! Her face was fire-engine red, and she was gasping for air! Tears rolled down her face as she fought against the pain, exhaustion and the deep desire to collapse mid-course! She was still jogging, but her pace had slowed so much that I was able to walk slowly beside her as I put my arm around her and whispered words of compassion, encouragement and strength! I knew the intense training she had endured in preparation for this race and her incredible desire to finish...and there was no way that I was about to let her collapse in my arms and walk away with a mile to go! It was time to finish well...so stride for stride, I ran beside her the last mile! We both cried our way to the finish line that morning, where the collapse in my arms quickly followed! I was so proud of the way she ran that race...but the way we finished truly transformed our relationship forever - building strength, unity, and the passion to enter in and finish the journey to which the Lord has called us!

I don't know what "spring storm" you may be facing right now, or where you may be in your marathon of a journey...but in our journey with Jackson and the move...we are at mile 12! We are exhausted, we are weary, weak and fighting through the pain of this storm - but we will finish! Stride by stride - as slow as they may be - with tears in our eyes and cries in our hearts...we will finish strong! And our desire as we bow down, that Christ will be lifted up! He is our Strength! He is our Peace! He is our Joy! He is our Hope and Confidence! And in Him we put our Trust! As we have shared from the beginning - this is His story of miracles and healing! He is the main character - and in this final mile we pray that He would reveal His glory and draw us closer to Him!

9 months ago...Kelly was woken at 4:30 in the morning and felt moved to pray a very simple prayer something like this: "Lord, I ask that you would bless our family in such a way that whenever someone is able to gaze upon us that they would see how you have touched and are apart of our lives!" And oh how He has answered that prayer! Selfishly...the thought/desire was that God would bless us with twins and that all would see through their lives the blessing of our Heavenly Father. But man, did He ever blow our selfish, human desire out of the water! He honored Kelly's prayer - no doubt - and He has blessed us indeed! With not only Jackson's life, heart and the miracles in the womb...but with the opportunity to experience the love, grace, compassion, mercy and care of our Savior through His Body - the community of all believers! God is in complete control, and we stand firm on the Promise of Romans 8:28 that all things will work together for the good - no matter how fierce the storm, or strong the sting - according to His Purpose, because of His Great Love!
And here is the Amazing thing...His Love is not limited to those who believe and have accepted His Son as Lord and Savior, but His Love is for the whole world - including those who will reject and turn their backs on Him! If you don't believe me...just read of the full expression of Christ's love for those who will betray him in John 13!
So whether you stand at mile 0 or mile 12, wherever you are in the midst of life's marathon rest in the encouragement that we have in Philippians 4: 6-7..."be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your request be made known to God, and the Peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your heart and your minds in Christ Jesus!" God will provide the strength, energy, mercy, love and all the resources necessary to finish the journey He has called us into - according to His purposes! He will finish the race with us storm by storm, stride by stride and embrace by embrace - with the full expression of His love and riches in glory in Christ Jesus!

Trust in the Lord! Let Him be your Hope and Confidence! And you will be blessed as your roots grow deep into the Living Water! I don't know about you...but I don't desire to be a "stunted shrub" in the wilderness - falling short of His purposes in my life! We must continue to walk by faith - as we "trust" and "obey"!

Jackson Update:
Kelly had her bi-weekly OB/GYN appointment with Dr. Mallinger on Tuesday, and there are no signs of complications with the pregnancy at this point - or reasons pointing to deliver Jackson early! Again, this is a huge blessing as Jackson continues to grow from an obstetrics perspective normally in utero - except for the left side of his heart! Dr. Mallinger did set the latest date for Jackson's delivery by c-section at December 2nd, but this date is one that will most likely change after next Wednesday's [November 4] appointment with our team of doctors from Children's and Magee Women's Hospital. We will have a far better feel as to a "game plan" for delivery following his echo and ultrasound, and our meeting with the neo-natal team.

Move Update:
We received a phone call late Tuesday night from Kevin and Beth (after a week of phone tag) and our move-in date has been moved up!! Praise The Lord!
We will be moving in the week of November 9th - prep days will be the 10th and 11th, with the moving truck unloading Thursday morning the 12th! We are so excited, and so thankful for the way that God continues to provide through this home! The house is located in Wexford - just minutes away from the church, our small-group community, Carter's preschool - where he will rejoin his class at the first of the year - and 20 minutes from the hospitals! There are still several plans/details to work out...but please continue to pray for God's strength, peace and energy in this move!

Are God is an awesome God! All Eyes on His Son, as we pursue and yield to the Holy Spirit in our lives!

Love you all!

Give Thanks...

Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good!
His faithful love endures forever.
Give thanks to the God of gods.
His faithful love endures forever.
Give thanks to the Lord of lords.
His faithful love endures forever.
Give thanks to him who alone does mighty miracles.
His faithful love endures forever.
Give thanks to him who made the heavens so skillfully.
His faithful love endures forever.
Give thanks to him who placed the earth among the waters.
His faithful love endures forever.
Give thanks to him who made the heavenly lights—
His faithful love endures forever.
the sun to rule the day,
His faithful love endures forever.
and the moon and stars to rule the night.
His faithful love endures forever...

Give thanks to him who led his people through the wilderness.
His faithful love endures forever! [Psalm 136: 1-16, NLT]

Anybody else want to break into song with me? Talk about a rally cry and don't you just love how David makes the motivation of our "giving thanks" crystal clear...for His Faithful Love Endures...Forever!

Kelly and I just returned home from an amazing trip to the Billy Graham Training Center at the Cove where we spent 5 days in the gorgeous landscape of the Blue Ridge Mountains of Asheville, NC! And if you want to talk about community...we were surrounded with incredible men and women of Faith that truly encouraged our souls through the demonstration and expression of God's Faithful Love! There were complete strangers praying, crying and encouraging us with experience, knowledge and wisdom! It was amazing to see how God moved in and through all those we had the opportunity to share God's story and miracle in Jackson's life!
It was a last minute trip, and one we will never forget! Two incredible bible teachers brought the Word...and 4 straight nights of rain! I mean it rained cats and dogs! But did we ever give thanks, because you see at the Cove they don't have downspouts to collect the rain when it pours. The rain just runs right off the roof, and onto "river rock" that has been strategically placed that just echos the tranquility of a waterfall throughout the campus! It is so quiet, so peaceful, and offers a retreat, rest and renewal all at the same time!
It is most likely the last trip and time we will have just the two of us before Jackson is here, and we took full advantage of this time alone, as we filled ourselves up with incredible food, fellowship and the encouraging Word! And when we returned home...we were whooped! Of course this was a ministry trip, and I had to speak 10 times in the 5 days as the Ministry Ambassador of the BGEA, but talk about an opportunity for incredible conversation and fellowship...Kel and I had more than 9 hours in the car both ways to pray, cry, laugh, plan and talk through so many aspects of our family, the move and Jackson - it was just incredible! We truly had a week to remember and give thanks for this incredible blessing...and here is the biggest walk away from our time at the Cove: God is - was - and always will be Totally Victorious! That's it...but oh how powerful that statement is!
Think about it...we face trial, struggle, adversity, danger, deception, defeat and discouragement every day - don't we? And yet what do we have to worry about: God is, was, and always will be Totally Victorious! And when my heart embraced these words from Pastor Don Wilton of 1st Baptist Spartanburg, SC...my perspective and posture was transformed! I' ve known this Promise of God for a long time now, but I am not going to lie to you - Kelly and I are worn out! We are absolutely exhausted! We are weary and weak...BUT GOD is, was and always will be Totally Victorious! That is the Promise of 2 Corinthians chapter 4! That is the Promise of Psalm 136! That is the Promise of the Living Word from Genesis to Revelation! We have stumbled at times, we have fallen, we have made mistakes, we have made poor decisions - and not just in the last three months! But there is Power in the Blood of Jesus that was poured out on the Cross of Calvary for you and for me - and forever will be Totally Victorious! That is the Seriously Ridiculous Love of our Heavenly Father! We are being pulled in so many different directions right now by life, health, the move, ministry, writing this blog [which by the way, never was intended to be what it has become...just being honest, but thank you to all of you who have shared your encouragement with Kelly and I to continue writing...but Praise Jesus not doug! Christ alone is Worthy to be Praised - and I am so blessed to be His vessel, and will continue to write as led by the Holy Spirit! I have four incredible gifts in my life that will forever be my first priority - Kelly, Carter, Jordyn and Jackson - right behind my relationship with Jesus Christ! And that means that at times there may be an extended delay in updating the blog as I spend time with Bubba, J.O. and Kel in these fainl weeks leading up to Jackson's birth - but don't worry...God is, was and always will be totally victorious! ] and there is renewal, restoration, and redemption in Christ's blood, and I give thanks for His Love never ends!
So how are we...never been better! Still exhausted, still uncomfortable, still experiencing a ton of adversity and struggle...but God is, was and forever will be totally victorious! Kel is 8 months pregnant - Praise the Lord - and experiencing being 8 months pregnant. Running to the bathroom 3 times throughout the night, extremely sore, and desperately ready to nest in the new home and we are all ready to get reconnected to our friends, church, and community! We miss you all so much...but this time in the wilderness (as I watch a beautiful morning begin with God's sunrise - imagine the view from Heaven! How cool will that be for all of us who know Christ Jesus as Lord!) has been transforming and absolutely awesome - in the truest definition of awe! God is at work...and we believe that greater things are yet to come!

Jackson update:
He continues to have great fetal movement! He continues to grow and literally is coming out kicking...he is a fighter! Jackson will be here - most likely - around Thanksgiving [that will be a new definition of "giving thanks"!] and we should know the exact "latest date" they will take him by c-section after our next appointment on November 4th! At our November 4th appointment Kelly and I will meet with the team of doctors to bring more clarity to the delivery plans following an echo and ultrasound. We will also be meeting with the Neo-natal teams of Magee Women's Hospital and Children's Hospital as we begin to prepare for Jackson's intensive care. And one note here...just because we are preparing for the worst, does not mean that we are expecting it! We truly do believe that God is going to heal Jackson! Period! But...how foolish would we be if God wants to heal Jackson through the ICU, and we/they are not prepared! We will continue to walk by faith...but God also has given us wisdom and knowledge to realize how severe Jackson's heart condition is, and He has blessed us with an incredible team of doctor's - and who knows He may just want to bring Glory to Himself through them! And so I am asking you to pray for Jackson fervently - but pray because you believe! Don't pray and then doubt...but continue to pray and let God encourage you through His response in His Faithfulness, Love, Mercy and Grace!

Move Update:
After meeting with Kevin and Beth a week and a half ago...the move-in date is set for November 14 - at this point! We knew the blessing of the moving company supporting us was huge on the front end and getting us out of 200 Andrew Drive, but how amazing is God's provision now that we will be moving in with at most only a couple weeks to get settled before Jackson arrives! It is going to be a tight turn around - but God is good and we will be leaning on our brothers and sisters in the Lord - don't you worry about that! Please continue to pray for Kevin and Beth in their transition and move to Lancaster, PA. Pray for their home search as they are trying to find a rental that will bring them the sense of community, security and "home" they desire! Kevin and Beth have been such a huge blessing to us - and I trust God will overwhelm them with incredible provision!

So there is the update...and sorry again for its length! But I hope that you were encouraged again as much as we were by the reminder of God's Promise and Total Victory! Be still...and know that He is God! Every knee will bow, and all the nations will Exalt our Lord - Christ Jesus! And thank you again for all your prayers, love and support! And as you reinforce the foundation of prayer that has been laid, remember to build each other up - and pray in the power of the Holy Spirit! [Jude 1:20]

All Eyes on Jesus!

Keep the Faith...

How can you say the Lord does not see your troubles [or] say God ignores your rights?
"Have you never heard? Have you never understood?
The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of all the earth. He never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depths of his understanding. He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength..."
The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease! Great is his faithfulness! His mercies begin afresh each morning. I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in Him!” [Isaiah 40:28-31 and Lamentations 3:22-24, NLT]

And when I remember this...even in the midst of "broken dreams", "shattered plans", "homelessness" and this "great storm of adversity"...we still have hope! For my hope is in the Lord, NOT in my wants, comfort, prosperity, material possessions, reputation, position, influence, status, or the world's systems, schemes and "list of what one deserves"! My Hope is in the Lord...period! He is our Rock! He is our Refuge! He is our Renewal, Restoration and Redemption! And in Him and through Him...all things are possible - for He is our Strength! So fix your eyes - right now - on His Son, our Savior and Redeemer - Christ Jesus, and not on this world!

Jackson Update:
Did you ever have to wait in pain? Wanting to be in the "know" of what is happening...well that is exactly what the last month was for Kelly and I! Every day we just wondered, and desperately wanted to know what was happening on the inside! I mean...come on...the last month seemed like eternity waiting for the update on Jackson's condition - and as we entered into the hospital last Thursday - our minds would just not turn off! It was like a fire hydrant - full of emotion and questions! The only problem was...it was only 55 degrees, and our fall shoes are in storage and so both Kel and I walked in wearing flip-flops! And man did we ever get some crazy looks...even Dr. Sherman made a comment about a "preacher" wearing flip-flops in October! It was hilarious...but Christ said to travel light, didn't he? [Mark 6:7-12...in case you don't believe me!]
The wait in the waiting room was long...but it was great to see some very familiar faces at this point, especially when Becca called us back - who has completed the last three ultrasounds now! And man did Jackson ever grow! He is huge...and in the 82 percentile - weighing in around 5lbs at this point! Which is huge - because in order to perform any surgery on his heart with the severity of his condition, he must be more than 5lbs! So give the Lord some praise - ya"ll!
From an "obstetrics" perspective...Jackson is developing wonderfully! He is "chubby" - as Becca put it - and Dr. Speer is very encouraged with Jackson's growth and development - BUT...
The left side of Jackson's heart is still not squeezing! The echo-cardiogram showed that even though the velocities and pressure being generated by the left ventricle has increased...the left side still shows no signs of a "squeeze"! It appears that the heart muscle is growing in size, and the aorta is developing with a forward flow, but now the focus is on the mitral valve and faramenovale [the hole between the two sides of the heart in every baby in utero that must remain open with Jackson's condition or he could "drown" from the inside out as fluid fills his lungs.] As of right now...the specific concern is that his mitral valve [the valve between the left atrium and ventricle] may be too small. The faramenovale looks great and has a good velocity/flow through it...but will be watched closely! So, that is the update...and here is the preliminary plan:
If there is no change in Jackson's condition...Kelly would deliver by c-section the week after Thanksgiving at Magee Women's Hospital in Pittsburgh. Jackson would be stabilized in Magee's NICU [Neo-natal Intensive Care Unit] and then transferred as soon as possible to Childrens Hospital of Pittsburgh's NICU, where he would undergo the Norwood series of surgeries [2 days, 2-3months, 2-3 years] to bypass the left side of his heart. At minimum...Jackson will be looking at a month in the NICU.
If the faramenovale begins to close...Kelly would deliver by emergency c-section immediately in Children's Hospital -and Jackson would under go emergency surgery in hopes of saving his life.
If the left side of his heart continues to develop and/or begins to squeeze...Kelly would deliver by c-section the week after Thanksgiving, Jackson would be stabilized and the severity of his condition assessed at that time - with a surgical plan to follow post-delivery!

So...The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease! Great is his faithfulness! His mercies begin afresh each morning. I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in Him!” Can I get an Amen? It ain't over...and God still has a ton of time to work! God is in control...and "those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint." [Isaiah 40:31-32]
Are we worried? Are we experiencing doubt, fear, disappointment, pain, struggle, adversity? You better believe it...BUT GOD! For our posture and perspective is fixed in the strength and peace we have in Him! For I echo Christ's prayer when he entered the Garden on the night in which He was betrayed - fell down before the Sovereign Throne of God's Grace - and prayed, “Abba, Father...everything is possible for you. Please take this cup of suffering away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine.” [Mark 14:36, NLT] And I plead with you that this be your posture and prayer as well! Ask of God that if there is any other way - that He would take away this cup of suffering and pain - but HIS WILL BE DONE, not ours! Let us be still...and know...that He is God, and His Love and Mercy never end! He is Faithful...His Will be done...and let us reflect His Glory and Image! So let's wear out our knees as we come before Him in prayer...and Keep the Faith!

Move Update:
And speaking of His Faithfulness...check this out! Two Saturday's ago...our good friends Jason and Jennifer called us to share some exciting news! There good friends Kevin and Beth [who just happen to live in a beautiful 4 bedroom home one house down the street] are taking a job transfer to the Lancaster, PA area [where I just happened to grow up] and wanted to know if we would be interested in renting their home! So - we are moving in the first or second weekend of November! The house is amazing...holding yet again every promise of our Heavenly Father...including His divine positioning with community and support within minutes of our church! You got it...we are "coming home" as Kelly put it, and will be in Wexford soon! Praise God - Hallelujah! We are so excited, and will be meeting with Kevin and Beth tonight to finalize plans! It truly is a win-win situation...and we are pumped! Can I get an Amen?
We are weary, exhausted and even overwhelmed at times...but only when we take our eyes of Christ and try to look at the whole picture in hopes of "strategizing" a plan! But we are determined, committed and willingly surrendered before His Throne of Grace - which is sufficient! We continue to pursue the Holy Spirit...and ask that He continues to renew and fill us with His strength and blessing - that we may be able to enjoy and extend it to others!
We love you all...and thanks for continuing to wait in Him with us! Keep the Faith and Keep it Real!
All Eyes on Jesus!