It is early...and I can't sleep! Kel and I both woke up around 3am - her stomach was upset and in knots, and I was worried about her! We watched the Gaither Homecoming hour - shared a couple of laughs, cries and songs together...and Bill Gaither's natural hair, really does look like a wig! I can't take credit for that joke - it was all Mark Lowry. But, after an hour with Bill and Gloria...then another hour watching the "WordBible" and studying 1 Timothy...I was wired for sound!
We received a text late tonight around 11:30 from our realtor, letting us know that he is arranging an appointment for us to speak with a real estate attorney on Monday regarding the sale of our home. My response: "Why?" Now, I have already talked with a great Christian brother of mine, who just happens to be a real estate attorney - two days ago - and after three days of stress and anxiety regarding the buyer's response - now, all of a sudden our agent wants to get an attorney involved? Not trusting this at all at this point...and then our agent breaks the news at midnight through another text that the buyer's agent's have already consulted legal counsel and are threatening legal action!
Come on - you have to be kidding me! So if the stress of find out that your baby has a fatal heart defect if there is no intervention, with the best "medical" hope of a normal/full life resting in an experimental procedure within the next two weeks to save his life, is not enough - throw in a move, that we have not begun to pack as we were desperately wanting to keep Carter and Jordyn's routine/home as normal as possible with everything that is going on, and now the threat of a legal battle! I am at a loss for words...
And here are the only words that come to mind:
"Be Still, and know that I am God!...For I know the plans I have for you, the are plans for good, and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope...be strong and courageous, for the Lord your God is with you...Jesus wept...do not let anyone look down upon you because you are young, but set an example to all believers by your faith, your life, your love, your speech, your purity...God is Love...I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us...Amen, Amen! Come Lord Jesus!
[Psalm 46:10, Jeremiah 29:11, Joshua 1:9, John 11:35, 1 Timothy 4:12, Philippians 3:12-14, Revelation 22:20]
I don't know about you...but this world needs to the Love and Light of Christ like never before! I ask that you pray for the buyers, their agents, our realtor and all who are involved with this situation! Do not curse them...do not condemn them...do not cast judgement...because we who are not without sin, can not, should not, and will not throw the first stone! Don't do it...put it down! Lean not on our own understanding, but trust in the Lord for He is a God of Love and may His Glory and Image be reflected in all that we do! Are you with me Church?
Stand Firm in His Word and "Love the Lord God with all your heart, with all your strength, with all your mind...and Love your neighbor as yourself!" ~Matthew 22:37-39~
All Eyes on Jesus...
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Crying out...
The amazing thing in all of this, is the overwhelming sense of community that we are experiencing with your prayers, words of encouragement, phone calls, love, and support! I can't begin to thank you enough for the ways you are rallying behind/around/in front of us - and it is truly because of the way God is moving in and through you!
Tonight was so hard...and we need your help! We spent the afternoon/evening driving through the Slippery Rock area looking at several homes/and prayer walking through one that we absolutely love - but truly would be a miracle if we could get into it in the next two weeks, as it is currently unfinished - no flooring, no light fixtures, bathrooms aren't in yet and as of right now there it does not seem that we would be able to turn around the financing/mortgage in two weeks...and as we drove through several communities, we could feel the discouragement starting to penetrate our hearts. And after about an hour and a half of driving I looked over at Kel and saw the tears streaming down her face. And of course - instantly this knucklehead broke and the tears began to roll. Kel looked at me and said "we should be focused on Jackson right now, and here we are having to worry and look for a home to live in! This is crazy...this is a distraction!" And I could not agree with her more...
I truly don't know how we are going to get through this move with all the decisions/procedures/appointments/research we have do for Jackson...and to be honest we know won't on our own strength! As many of you know...Kel and I are not great at asking for help - it is part of that "first born syndrome" we both have! But tonight, we are crying out to God for help! We are looking to Him for answers as to why, where, how, when - and we know that he may not speak these to us right now, but we will continue to wait upon the Lord and know that He holds our future, and He has already gone before us! This is the scariest thing we have ever gone through - and I am not sure where we would be with out the Body of Christ - YOU - right beside us! We are the Church...and I just want to say thank you for allowing the love and light of Christ to shine through you! We are called to make every effort in keeping the Unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace - and that peace only comes through His Grace! His Grace is sufficient, and His Power works through our weakness - and tonight we come before Him sweetly broken, and wholly surrendered crying out for His Power to work through our weakness!
Please continue to pray for strength, wisdom, discernment and peace...specifically for Jackson and for our home! Pray for peace and healing to come over Kelly and Jackson in ways never seen before! He is the King of Kings, Lord of Lords, Mighty God, Wonderful Counselor, Prince of Peace and Great Healer and He is larger than anything we are facing right now...and in Him we will stand firm!!!
All Eyes on Jesus...
Tonight was so hard...and we need your help! We spent the afternoon/evening driving through the Slippery Rock area looking at several homes/and prayer walking through one that we absolutely love - but truly would be a miracle if we could get into it in the next two weeks, as it is currently unfinished - no flooring, no light fixtures, bathrooms aren't in yet and as of right now there it does not seem that we would be able to turn around the financing/mortgage in two weeks...and as we drove through several communities, we could feel the discouragement starting to penetrate our hearts. And after about an hour and a half of driving I looked over at Kel and saw the tears streaming down her face. And of course - instantly this knucklehead broke and the tears began to roll. Kel looked at me and said "we should be focused on Jackson right now, and here we are having to worry and look for a home to live in! This is crazy...this is a distraction!" And I could not agree with her more...
I truly don't know how we are going to get through this move with all the decisions/procedures/appointments/research we have do for Jackson...and to be honest we know won't on our own strength! As many of you know...Kel and I are not great at asking for help - it is part of that "first born syndrome" we both have! But tonight, we are crying out to God for help! We are looking to Him for answers as to why, where, how, when - and we know that he may not speak these to us right now, but we will continue to wait upon the Lord and know that He holds our future, and He has already gone before us! This is the scariest thing we have ever gone through - and I am not sure where we would be with out the Body of Christ - YOU - right beside us! We are the Church...and I just want to say thank you for allowing the love and light of Christ to shine through you! We are called to make every effort in keeping the Unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace - and that peace only comes through His Grace! His Grace is sufficient, and His Power works through our weakness - and tonight we come before Him sweetly broken, and wholly surrendered crying out for His Power to work through our weakness!
Please continue to pray for strength, wisdom, discernment and peace...specifically for Jackson and for our home! Pray for peace and healing to come over Kelly and Jackson in ways never seen before! He is the King of Kings, Lord of Lords, Mighty God, Wonderful Counselor, Prince of Peace and Great Healer and He is larger than anything we are facing right now...and in Him we will stand firm!!!
All Eyes on Jesus...
Seriously Ridiculous..."pick up the pen!"
"Seriously Ridiculous"...is a phrase that I picked up while attending a Youth Specialties Conference this past November in Nashville, TN - while listening to Francis Chan talk about his walk of faith, and his book "Crazy Love" - I recommend you pick this up, if you have not already done so! And "seriously ridiculous" completely and precisely explains God incredible Love for you and me, and the journey that we are currently walking through!
Last night - was one of the hardest nights Kelly and I have ever faced! Here we are facing the news of Jackson's condition - and the only "sight" of stability was to take our home off the market, get out of the contract, and not close July 24th, allowing us to stay in our home 15 minutes away from the doctors and hospitals that Kel and Jackson will "most likely" need over the next several months/years of our life! But - our God is in the restoration/redemption business, and no matter how hard the news was to take, and how hard our cry was last night...God opened our blind eyes, unlocked our deaf ears and continues to walk every step with us! And this is exactly why we call Him, Emmanuel...because Christ is with us!
After many hours of prayer and conversation with our wise counsel, experts in the field of real estate, and our obligations in the contract...it looks like the Lord has asked us to "pick up the pen!" and continue in the move! Of course my "natural reaction" late last night and early this morning as Kel and I prayed through the Spirit's prompting...was "God, this is seriously ridiculous!" And His response to that reaction came through Kelly's prayer/devotion time in the form of this question: "Doug, do you have faith in your finances!" First off - this is a question I have never faced before! Of course I have faith in the healing process of Jackson, our family relationships, our community, our church, our "positions", and our Lord and Savior who is in all, over all and through all...but not once have I ever been "face slapped" with this question! And now - I am in a moment of decision.
Of course I bring faith into financial decisions - but that was not God's question! His question is..."do you have faith in your finances, or faith in me?" And there it is...the question of Matthew 6:24. Are you going to trust God for direction and life, or are you going to trust your financial perspective! And I have never been "laid out/fully exposed" like I am right now...because here is the truth! Not just from a dollar and cents perspective - but from the the worlds perspective of stability, emotions, stress, finances and health we - as a family - can not "afford" to move! And if we hold on to those strings, we can't grab a hold of the Promises of God!
So we are cutting the strings, and grabbing a hold of His Promises! Psalm 37:4 teaches us that as we draw close to Him, He will give us the desires of our heart! And as we have been drawing close to him over the last several years, and in the early morning hours today - He has given us the desire to have faith in Him, not our finances and continue to walk by Faith and not by the sight of this world!
Now, how can God ask us yesterday to put the pen down...and then today ask us to pick it up! Simple: the question is not of the pen, but of obedience! Yes, we will continue to put the full armor of God on in the midst of this storm and the attacks - and He has revealed His Glory, Majesty and Presence in our family's move! Its "seriously ridiculous", but so is His love for you and us!
Please join us today...praying for the home He has prepared for us, the place of sanctuary, restoration, health, space, and the opportunity to serve and invest in a community/church that He is calling us to! Specifically...we have been drawn to a home in the Slippery Rock Area that would provide us just that - and we will be going on a prayer walk tonight around this property at 6:30...and I am asking you to join us in prayer at that time that God's supernatural, divine intervention and provision would make a way for us to see His will clearly, as he is the author of clarity not of confusion! There is no way "from the world's vantage point" that we can obtain a mortgage and move in the next two weeks with all that we have to face regarding Jackson's care - but our faith is not in the things of earth, but of the treasure that lies inside of our hearts! So as broken clay jars...we are crying out in desperation for Him to continue to open our eyes...so we can see Him at work, open ears ...so we can hear his voice of truth and encouragement, and open our hearts so we can come to know His Son our Lord - Christ Jesus - more intimately right now!
We love you...and we thank you for all of your prayers, encouragement, stories of hope, support and grace that you are sharing with us along this "seriously ridiculous" journey!
All Eyes on Jesus...
Last night - was one of the hardest nights Kelly and I have ever faced! Here we are facing the news of Jackson's condition - and the only "sight" of stability was to take our home off the market, get out of the contract, and not close July 24th, allowing us to stay in our home 15 minutes away from the doctors and hospitals that Kel and Jackson will "most likely" need over the next several months/years of our life! But - our God is in the restoration/redemption business, and no matter how hard the news was to take, and how hard our cry was last night...God opened our blind eyes, unlocked our deaf ears and continues to walk every step with us! And this is exactly why we call Him, Emmanuel...because Christ is with us!
After many hours of prayer and conversation with our wise counsel, experts in the field of real estate, and our obligations in the contract...it looks like the Lord has asked us to "pick up the pen!" and continue in the move! Of course my "natural reaction" late last night and early this morning as Kel and I prayed through the Spirit's prompting...was "God, this is seriously ridiculous!" And His response to that reaction came through Kelly's prayer/devotion time in the form of this question: "Doug, do you have faith in your finances!" First off - this is a question I have never faced before! Of course I have faith in the healing process of Jackson, our family relationships, our community, our church, our "positions", and our Lord and Savior who is in all, over all and through all...but not once have I ever been "face slapped" with this question! And now - I am in a moment of decision.
Of course I bring faith into financial decisions - but that was not God's question! His question is..."do you have faith in your finances, or faith in me?" And there it is...the question of Matthew 6:24. Are you going to trust God for direction and life, or are you going to trust your financial perspective! And I have never been "laid out/fully exposed" like I am right now...because here is the truth! Not just from a dollar and cents perspective - but from the the worlds perspective of stability, emotions, stress, finances and health we - as a family - can not "afford" to move! And if we hold on to those strings, we can't grab a hold of the Promises of God!
So we are cutting the strings, and grabbing a hold of His Promises! Psalm 37:4 teaches us that as we draw close to Him, He will give us the desires of our heart! And as we have been drawing close to him over the last several years, and in the early morning hours today - He has given us the desire to have faith in Him, not our finances and continue to walk by Faith and not by the sight of this world!
Now, how can God ask us yesterday to put the pen down...and then today ask us to pick it up! Simple: the question is not of the pen, but of obedience! Yes, we will continue to put the full armor of God on in the midst of this storm and the attacks - and He has revealed His Glory, Majesty and Presence in our family's move! Its "seriously ridiculous", but so is His love for you and us!
Please join us today...praying for the home He has prepared for us, the place of sanctuary, restoration, health, space, and the opportunity to serve and invest in a community/church that He is calling us to! Specifically...we have been drawn to a home in the Slippery Rock Area that would provide us just that - and we will be going on a prayer walk tonight around this property at 6:30...and I am asking you to join us in prayer at that time that God's supernatural, divine intervention and provision would make a way for us to see His will clearly, as he is the author of clarity not of confusion! There is no way "from the world's vantage point" that we can obtain a mortgage and move in the next two weeks with all that we have to face regarding Jackson's care - but our faith is not in the things of earth, but of the treasure that lies inside of our hearts! So as broken clay jars...we are crying out in desperation for Him to continue to open our eyes...so we can see Him at work, open ears ...so we can hear his voice of truth and encouragement, and open our hearts so we can come to know His Son our Lord - Christ Jesus - more intimately right now!
We love you...and we thank you for all of your prayers, encouragement, stories of hope, support and grace that you are sharing with us along this "seriously ridiculous" journey!
All Eyes on Jesus...
Friday, July 10, 2009
Another wave...Standing Firm!
"For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places. Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm." ~Ephesians 6:12-13, NLT~
Tonight...yet another wave!
Following the great news of the Amnio this afternoon - the enemy brought a full blown attack! Earlier this morning, we contacted our realtor to inform him of what we found out yesterday afternoon, in regards to the severity of Jackson's condition. We truly felt that the Lord was leading/prompting us to get out of our contract, and walk away from the move, and "to put the "pen down" at this point! (Scripture ref. Genesis 22)
Tonight-we recieved a series of emails from the buyer's agent that they are not allowing us/or willing to walk away from the deal. If we decide not to sell at this point - they are asking for more than $5000 and probably closer to $10,000 to cover the buying agent's commission, the buyer's relocation and temporary housing - since their current home is scheduled to close as well on July 24 - along with any out of pocket expense indured by the buyers and their agents! I share this not to point fingers, or to cast judgement on the buyers...but it was just a true glimpse at how "the world works" and the wicked schemes that the enemy brings!
Not going to lie...we are rocked right now! In this midst everything going on - we can't afford to move and we can't afford to stay! Let alone know where to move to? We are truly in between a rock and a hard place...Can't even begin to tell you how many tears we have shed tonight! Can't believe that we may actually have to go through with the sale of our home and move in the midst of this...
But God...and here is the word we are standing firm on right now: [2 Corinthians 4:7-10, NLT]
"We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.
-We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed.
-We are perplexed, but not driven to despair.
-We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God.
-We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed.
Through suffering, our bodies continue to share in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies."
Please continue to pray tonight for strength and understanding! We do not see any way out right now...or where to go if we are forced to move, but we ask and trust that God will open our blind eyes, unlock our deaf ears and pick us up out of this place and intervene right now! We are standing firm, and accept it by Faith, that He knows the plans He has for us, not of disaster, but one of hope in Christ! And even though we can not "see" right now...we will continue to walk by faith, praising His Name - leaning not on our own understanding, but seeking His will - and it is His promise found in Proverbs 3:6 "that He will guide our path!"
All eyes on Jesus...
Tonight...yet another wave!
Following the great news of the Amnio this afternoon - the enemy brought a full blown attack! Earlier this morning, we contacted our realtor to inform him of what we found out yesterday afternoon, in regards to the severity of Jackson's condition. We truly felt that the Lord was leading/prompting us to get out of our contract, and walk away from the move, and "to put the "pen down" at this point! (Scripture ref. Genesis 22)
Tonight-we recieved a series of emails from the buyer's agent that they are not allowing us/or willing to walk away from the deal. If we decide not to sell at this point - they are asking for more than $5000 and probably closer to $10,000 to cover the buying agent's commission, the buyer's relocation and temporary housing - since their current home is scheduled to close as well on July 24 - along with any out of pocket expense indured by the buyers and their agents! I share this not to point fingers, or to cast judgement on the buyers...but it was just a true glimpse at how "the world works" and the wicked schemes that the enemy brings!
Not going to lie...we are rocked right now! In this midst everything going on - we can't afford to move and we can't afford to stay! Let alone know where to move to? We are truly in between a rock and a hard place...Can't even begin to tell you how many tears we have shed tonight! Can't believe that we may actually have to go through with the sale of our home and move in the midst of this...
But God...and here is the word we are standing firm on right now: [2 Corinthians 4:7-10, NLT]
"We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.
-We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed.
-We are perplexed, but not driven to despair.
-We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God.
-We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed.
Through suffering, our bodies continue to share in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies."
Please continue to pray tonight for strength and understanding! We do not see any way out right now...or where to go if we are forced to move, but we ask and trust that God will open our blind eyes, unlock our deaf ears and pick us up out of this place and intervene right now! We are standing firm, and accept it by Faith, that He knows the plans He has for us, not of disaster, but one of hope in Christ! And even though we can not "see" right now...we will continue to walk by faith, praising His Name - leaning not on our own understanding, but seeking His will - and it is His promise found in Proverbs 3:6 "that He will guide our path!"
All eyes on Jesus...
Amnio Results...
Praise God...
We just received word that the preliminary Amnio results are in, and show that Jackson has NO genetic or chromosomal mis-match defects!!! Meaning...all interventions are still on the table! Hallelujiah! This is an answer to prayer...
Please continue to pray specifically for wisdom, knowledge and discernment over the weekend as we lean into God! "In Him lies hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge" - Colossians 2:3
Thanks again for all your encouragement, love and prayers!
All Eyes on Jesus...
We just received word that the preliminary Amnio results are in, and show that Jackson has NO genetic or chromosomal mis-match defects!!! Meaning...all interventions are still on the table! Hallelujiah! This is an answer to prayer...
Please continue to pray specifically for wisdom, knowledge and discernment over the weekend as we lean into God! "In Him lies hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge" - Colossians 2:3
Thanks again for all your encouragement, love and prayers!
All Eyes on Jesus...
The Promise...
Well as you may know, the last few months have been very interesting! And this first post is to get you get you caught up to speed... just in case you forgot to fasten your "5-point safety harness" or "full-face mask, helmet, riding jacket and boots"! And just as a side note...you may want to now, as you journey with us!
About two months ago, the Lord laid it clearly on Kelly and my heart that a move was coming! And at first, our response was..."are you kidding? We are three months pregnant with our third, we just came through a miracle with the motorcycle accident, we are not yet transitioned fully into my role with the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association, and you are asking us to move?" But as we drew close to Him, He laid the desire on our heart to trust Him, and yield to the Spirit's prompting to put our house on the market and walk by faith, not by sight! He gave us the scripture reference of Joshua 4, where Joshua and the Israelite Nation stood at the bank of the flooded, Jordan River with the promise of a miracle on the other side! And even though there were so many reasons that this world and the ways of man told us it was not the "right time", and that there was no way the waters could part (not having or even knowing of the home we were moving too, the declining market in Western PA/Pittsburgh, our economic status, etc.) ...we got our feet wet and signed the papers!
So...the house "officially" went on the market Monday, June 15th with the first showing scheduled for 8am. And now...the parting of the waters - are you ready for this? As I was preparing to speak at Westminster College that morning for the Rotary Youth Leadership Conference (RYLA), I got a txt/email message at 11am that an offer had been made on our home for more than the asking price! 3 hours on the market...that's it! Now - tell me how awesome our God is! When He moves...He Moves!
So over the last three weeks, we have been moving forward with the appraisal/closing/moving/home inspection repairs and getting everything lined up to close July 24! Now the crazy thing about all of this...and now looking back, not so crazy at all...is that we could not find a home to move into. We spent endless hours searching the internet, networking with our friends, family and community, taking exhausting afternoon/Sunday drives looking for the "one", and even praying through a huge move to Charlotte, NC - which is a place where both Kel and I would love to live! An hour and half from the beach - hello!!!!!
So here we are two weeks out - and truly have no place to move in to! But over this past weekend, my mom and dad sat down with us to have a "realistic/in case of emergency" conversation about temporally moving into their home on the farm, where my dad grew up outside of Dayton, PA, if nothing else opened up. But that is not the reason for this blog or the end of the story, as many of you know...
And so as the house search and moving process continues - but the scripture reference changed! There began to be elements/situations/experiences that were "waves" over the last two weeks as we walked on water! And that is when the wise counsel came from a dear brother in Christ...his text message read: "When you are walking on water - all eyes on Jesus!" We were no longer at the Jordan River, but Christ had called us out of the boat and we were walking on water - and the storm was raging! Waves, wind, thunder - the whole deal...and it was time to re-fix our eyes on Jesus, and man He reached down and grabbed us up out of the water, and into His arms and began preparing us for what came next!
This past Tuesday we headed into Magee Women's Hospital in Pittsburgh, PA to have our routine ultrasound at 20 weeks, and to hopefully find out what we were having! I know, I know...you who like surprises are crazy! We are two "first-borns", with two already, and we needed to get planned up! And yet again...God reminded us that when walking on water - His plans only, and not ours! As we gazed in amazement at the ultrasound of our baby boy - we knew something just wasn't right as the nurse studied Jackson Douglas' heart! (yes, Jackson is his name - which we have known for many months now, and there is no correlation with Michael Jackson's death, even though I am a huge Thriller fan!) Our concerns were confirmed as the nurse retrieved Dr. Speers to take a closer look - and then the news came! The ultrasound showed a heart defect with the left side regurgitating the blood between chambers, with the doctor's unsure about normal development of the aorta and the severity of his condition.
Well, yesterday - Thursday, July 9, 2009 - after an echo cardiogram, Tuesday's findings were confirmed. Jackson has a very severe heart defect. The leading pediatric cardiologist, Dr. Sherman, shared that on a scale of 0 to 5, 0 being normal, Jackson's condition is a 5. He has aortic stenosis, where the aorta is so thick that the blood is unable to pass through the aortic valve out of the left ventricle, causing pressure to build on the left side of the heart, enlarging it severely and not allowing it to pump/contract/function. Within the next couple of weeks - the left side of Jackson's heart will collapse and form what is called "hypoplastic left heart syndrome". This defect is fatal condition if there we would choose not to intervene
Our first option is the "natural course of action" - meaning Kelly would carry Jackson full term, deliver around the beginning of December, and Jackson would live for only 2-3 days. He is currently developing normally, besides the heart defect, being right heart dependent in the womb, and has an awesome assist partner in Kelly - supplying all the blood and oxygen he needs to develop.
Our second option - which is not an option at all for us - is terminate the pregnancy now.
Our third option - is to begin a series of surgies upon delivery to by pass the left ventricle and re-route the blood to the lungs and body. This option would require a surgery immediately upon delivery, another at 2-3 months, yet another at 2-3 years, and then most likely a full heart transplant by the age of 30.
Our fourth option - is an experimental surgery, that has only ever been attempted once in the history of Pittsburgh's Children's Hospital, which is an in-utero procedure where a highly skilled team of doctors would go through Kelly's uterus with a needle, into Jackson's chest, into his heart, then into his aorta (which is currently about the width of a dime), inflate a balloon-like device to "in theory" stretch the aorta and "hopefully" allow the blood to begin flowing out of the left ventricle and into the aorta. This procedure would have to be done within the next couple of weeks - IF the results of the Amnio come back showing no genetic/chromosomal defects. We should know the results of the Amnio late today or on Monday.
Obviously our world has been rocked! And the only way we are not curled up in a corner...is because Christ is holding us in the palm of his hands! The promise of Psalm 29:11 - is that He will give us His Strength and His Peace in the midst of this storm! He is our Rock, He is our Salvation, He is our Hope, Joy and Peace - and we stand firm that all things are possible through Christ! Which leads me to option 5! Supernatural, divine, miraculous healing! God is the one who created Jackson, cell by cell, and He knows/formed/shaped his heart - and can heal is heart in a heart beat! And yes - the pun was intended!! God is larger than this storm, and He is in every detail!
But we need your help! We need your prayers right now! It was Mr. Billy Graham that taught me that we have an awesome privilege, responsibility and power on this side of heaven - and that is through the glorious and awesome power of prayer! Please join us in prayer for strength, wisdom, discernment and healing! I have witnessed before the work, power, glory and majesty of His Healing hands through the body of Christ that is united in one faith, one hope, one baptism, one Lord that is in all, over all and through all! So please, let us join together, in tears and in prayers and ask, just as it is written in His word, that as we come before His Throne and the Cross of Christ that we be anxious in nothing, but in everything through prayer and petition that we present our requests to Him!
We love you, and we are so thankful for your prayers, friendship, encouragement and support! We trust in the victorious life we have in our Risen Lord and Savior - Christ Jesus - and we will continue to walk by faith, and not by sight...
All Eyes on Jesus!
About two months ago, the Lord laid it clearly on Kelly and my heart that a move was coming! And at first, our response was..."are you kidding? We are three months pregnant with our third, we just came through a miracle with the motorcycle accident, we are not yet transitioned fully into my role with the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association, and you are asking us to move?" But as we drew close to Him, He laid the desire on our heart to trust Him, and yield to the Spirit's prompting to put our house on the market and walk by faith, not by sight! He gave us the scripture reference of Joshua 4, where Joshua and the Israelite Nation stood at the bank of the flooded, Jordan River with the promise of a miracle on the other side! And even though there were so many reasons that this world and the ways of man told us it was not the "right time", and that there was no way the waters could part (not having or even knowing of the home we were moving too, the declining market in Western PA/Pittsburgh, our economic status, etc.) ...we got our feet wet and signed the papers!
So...the house "officially" went on the market Monday, June 15th with the first showing scheduled for 8am. And now...the parting of the waters - are you ready for this? As I was preparing to speak at Westminster College that morning for the Rotary Youth Leadership Conference (RYLA), I got a txt/email message at 11am that an offer had been made on our home for more than the asking price! 3 hours on the market...that's it! Now - tell me how awesome our God is! When He moves...He Moves!
So over the last three weeks, we have been moving forward with the appraisal/closing/moving/home inspection repairs and getting everything lined up to close July 24! Now the crazy thing about all of this...and now looking back, not so crazy at all...is that we could not find a home to move into. We spent endless hours searching the internet, networking with our friends, family and community, taking exhausting afternoon/Sunday drives looking for the "one", and even praying through a huge move to Charlotte, NC - which is a place where both Kel and I would love to live! An hour and half from the beach - hello!!!!!
So here we are two weeks out - and truly have no place to move in to! But over this past weekend, my mom and dad sat down with us to have a "realistic/in case of emergency" conversation about temporally moving into their home on the farm, where my dad grew up outside of Dayton, PA, if nothing else opened up. But that is not the reason for this blog or the end of the story, as many of you know...
And so as the house search and moving process continues - but the scripture reference changed! There began to be elements/situations/experiences that were "waves" over the last two weeks as we walked on water! And that is when the wise counsel came from a dear brother in Christ...his text message read: "When you are walking on water - all eyes on Jesus!" We were no longer at the Jordan River, but Christ had called us out of the boat and we were walking on water - and the storm was raging! Waves, wind, thunder - the whole deal...and it was time to re-fix our eyes on Jesus, and man He reached down and grabbed us up out of the water, and into His arms and began preparing us for what came next!
This past Tuesday we headed into Magee Women's Hospital in Pittsburgh, PA to have our routine ultrasound at 20 weeks, and to hopefully find out what we were having! I know, I know...you who like surprises are crazy! We are two "first-borns", with two already, and we needed to get planned up! And yet again...God reminded us that when walking on water - His plans only, and not ours! As we gazed in amazement at the ultrasound of our baby boy - we knew something just wasn't right as the nurse studied Jackson Douglas' heart! (yes, Jackson is his name - which we have known for many months now, and there is no correlation with Michael Jackson's death, even though I am a huge Thriller fan!) Our concerns were confirmed as the nurse retrieved Dr. Speers to take a closer look - and then the news came! The ultrasound showed a heart defect with the left side regurgitating the blood between chambers, with the doctor's unsure about normal development of the aorta and the severity of his condition.
Well, yesterday - Thursday, July 9, 2009 - after an echo cardiogram, Tuesday's findings were confirmed. Jackson has a very severe heart defect. The leading pediatric cardiologist, Dr. Sherman, shared that on a scale of 0 to 5, 0 being normal, Jackson's condition is a 5. He has aortic stenosis, where the aorta is so thick that the blood is unable to pass through the aortic valve out of the left ventricle, causing pressure to build on the left side of the heart, enlarging it severely and not allowing it to pump/contract/function. Within the next couple of weeks - the left side of Jackson's heart will collapse and form what is called "hypoplastic left heart syndrome". This defect is fatal condition if there we would choose not to intervene
Our first option is the "natural course of action" - meaning Kelly would carry Jackson full term, deliver around the beginning of December, and Jackson would live for only 2-3 days. He is currently developing normally, besides the heart defect, being right heart dependent in the womb, and has an awesome assist partner in Kelly - supplying all the blood and oxygen he needs to develop.
Our second option - which is not an option at all for us - is terminate the pregnancy now.
Our third option - is to begin a series of surgies upon delivery to by pass the left ventricle and re-route the blood to the lungs and body. This option would require a surgery immediately upon delivery, another at 2-3 months, yet another at 2-3 years, and then most likely a full heart transplant by the age of 30.
Our fourth option - is an experimental surgery, that has only ever been attempted once in the history of Pittsburgh's Children's Hospital, which is an in-utero procedure where a highly skilled team of doctors would go through Kelly's uterus with a needle, into Jackson's chest, into his heart, then into his aorta (which is currently about the width of a dime), inflate a balloon-like device to "in theory" stretch the aorta and "hopefully" allow the blood to begin flowing out of the left ventricle and into the aorta. This procedure would have to be done within the next couple of weeks - IF the results of the Amnio come back showing no genetic/chromosomal defects. We should know the results of the Amnio late today or on Monday.
Obviously our world has been rocked! And the only way we are not curled up in a corner...is because Christ is holding us in the palm of his hands! The promise of Psalm 29:11 - is that He will give us His Strength and His Peace in the midst of this storm! He is our Rock, He is our Salvation, He is our Hope, Joy and Peace - and we stand firm that all things are possible through Christ! Which leads me to option 5! Supernatural, divine, miraculous healing! God is the one who created Jackson, cell by cell, and He knows/formed/shaped his heart - and can heal is heart in a heart beat! And yes - the pun was intended!! God is larger than this storm, and He is in every detail!
But we need your help! We need your prayers right now! It was Mr. Billy Graham that taught me that we have an awesome privilege, responsibility and power on this side of heaven - and that is through the glorious and awesome power of prayer! Please join us in prayer for strength, wisdom, discernment and healing! I have witnessed before the work, power, glory and majesty of His Healing hands through the body of Christ that is united in one faith, one hope, one baptism, one Lord that is in all, over all and through all! So please, let us join together, in tears and in prayers and ask, just as it is written in His word, that as we come before His Throne and the Cross of Christ that we be anxious in nothing, but in everything through prayer and petition that we present our requests to Him!
We love you, and we are so thankful for your prayers, friendship, encouragement and support! We trust in the victorious life we have in our Risen Lord and Savior - Christ Jesus - and we will continue to walk by faith, and not by sight...
All Eyes on Jesus!
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