A kick in the gut...

So Jesus said...“Put your sword away. Shall I not drink the cup [which My] Father has given Me?” [John 18:11, NIV/NKJV]

"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world - but be transformed - by the renewing of your mind" and I say it again..."Rejoice in the Lord always! Let your gentleness be known to all men. The Lord is at hand. Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus!" [Romans 12: 2 and Philippians 4:4-7, NIV]

I don't know your betrayal experience - but many of us have felt the shock, awe, amazement, gasp for air and "stunned" feeling it creates! It may have been a spouse, a friend, a congregation, a student, a colleague, a partner, a boss, a company or a community. Whatever and whoever the situation, circumstance or experience involves - please put down your sword! I plead with you...put it away - right now - before I even begin to share this story!

A kick in the gut...didn't see this one coming!
Yesterday morning was awesome - it started with a cinnamon crunch bagel, sliced and toasted with Honey Walnut cream cheese - accompanied by hazelnut coffee - all over a great conversation with a phenomenal brother in Christ ! Now, that is the way to start a Friday morning - two knuckleheads laughing and carrying on in Panera - iron sharpening iron - sharing life, ministry and encouragement with one another, both having faced a very tough 6 week stretch! Straight up - I think we both would have fell asleep if it were not for the coffee! We shared story after story as he caught me up on sending his oldest daughter off to college Thursday, his aunt who is not doing well, his family and the church...and I got him up to speed on Jackson, Kel and the kids, and the house in Gibsonia for rent that we were pumped to see later in the day!
And as we closed our conversation and prayer time together, it was laid on his heart to share with me a scene from Braveheart! You know the one - the Battle of Sterling! Where the English army stands across the open field from the Scottish clans lead by William Wallace. The chanting, the screaming, the drum beats, the mocking, the archers and then the hilarious scene - the mooning - and of course more flying arrows, and shields!
And then the moment of truth...Longshanks sends the English horses on full attack! As horseman charge and the pounding of the earth intensifies...Wallace yell out to his militia of misfits, "hold, Hold, HOLD!" And without warning - at the perfect moment - the Scottsmen kneel, grab their spears lying hidden on the ground, lift them into the air and annihilate the strength of the English army - without even taking a step!
The enemy wants to intimidate us, mock us and sow thoughts of doubt, fear and anger into our lives, bringing a relentless attack - scheme after scheme - and we must HOLD! Because our spear is the Living Word! We don't have to take so much a step - but speak the Living Word, the Truth, the Word of God and the enemy and his schemes will be annihilated!

Back to the story...so, Kel and I packed up the kids - and the car - around 3:30 and headed south with our joyful anticipation deepening for the house that we were going to look at in Gibsonia at 6:00pm! We were so pumped - totally stoked - and with an hour and half drive ahead of us, we decided to leave a little early so we could drive past and "scout" the exterior of the house and the community prior to having dinner with our friends Jason and Jennifer.
The trip down was awesome! Kelly and I had a wonderful conversation - planning, dreaming, and preparing for any and all things as Carter and Jordyn watched the Big River Rescue! We were a little nervous...not going to lie...and the closer we got to the house - the more the anticipation built! We drove up into the housing plan, past several new patio homes/condos and new construction, when we finally reached Shadow Court. We made the left and down the street we went, like two kids on Christmas morning!
The cul-de-sac street was awesome with about 20 great homes, play sets in the backyards, very friendly neighbors, and well maintained properties! And then we laid eyes on the house! It was beautiful! It was in a great location, great yard, and great setting...and man were we ever excited! We drove past ever so slowly, noticing the new landscaping and beginning to "move in" mentally and emotionally! So it was all systems go...and we had our plan in place after four days of intense prayer and conversations with our wise counsel!
We had to make a quick pit stop at the Gibsonia Giant Eagle before heading to Jason and Jennifer's to pick up our new favorite dessert: Reese's Peanut Butter Cup Ice Cream with Reese's Chocolate Peanut Butter "Shell" topping! Good stuff - ya'll! Thanks Aimee and Kirk for the recipe!
So after the 5 minute pit stop - it was down the road 10 minutes to Wexford for dinner! And as we sat at the stop light - right in front of our home church, NorthWay - I picked up my phone and noticed that I had a missed call! Carter was making a comment about the "water fall working properly" at the new stores, when I got the voicemail...

Hi Doug, this is Karen with the home for rent in Gibsonia. I was hoping not to leave this on voicemail, but I just accepted a security deposit on the home from a couple who drove up early from North Carolina to see the home. He is a senior pastor in the area, and will be taking the home - so it is no longer available. Please call me back at your earliest convenience as I don't want you to waste your time driving down here tonight.

I could not even form words when I hung up the phone! I did not even know the emotion that I was experiencing...I was stunned, shocked, kicked in the gut! I mean after all we have been through in the last 6 weeks with Jackson, the selling of our house, living in the "wilderness" away from our friends and community - talk about a kick to the gut! It knocked the wind right out of me in split second...BUT - all I could hear was the Holy Spirit yelling: "hold, Hold, HOLD!" I looked over at Kel and she knew right away, and to see the emotion on her face...ripped my heart out, not only as a daddy, but as a husband! We were silent the last two minutes of the drive to Jason and Jen's, and literally sat in their driveway for 5 minutes collecting our thoughts, dreams and emotions that had spilled out all over the floor! It was tough...BUT GOD!
Yes - we were betrayed! As we were asked by Karen, two days earlier if we could come see the house sooner than Sunday...that she wanted us to have the first crack at the house, and felt it was a perfect fit for our family! And yes - we felt the sting of the blow...but were not betrayed by God! God never leaves us, never foresakes us...and man, it was hard to drop the sword on the ground and not go after some one's head!
Once we got into the house - got the kids playing - updated Jas and Jen...I called Karen back and congratulated her, and wished her and the Pastor's family (who is moving into the area from Graham, NC and will be pastoring at Macedonia) well and that we will be praying for them all and that we hoped everything works out well!
When we kicked, punched and our feet taken out from under us...the world tells us to pick the sword, hit em' back, and react! But - we must choose to respond with the Grace, Love, Forgiveness and Kindness that Christ first showed us! We must not conform to the ways of man! God is in control - we must Hold - and continue to Wait upon His perfect timing! He will provide - and will meet our every need - just as He has done and is doing! We must remain patient...for greater things are yet to come! Greater things are still to be done!

And this morning when I woke...this was the scripture reference waiting for me on my blackberry from the Marketplace Leaders devotional I receive daily:

Not that I am looking for a gift, but I am looking for what may be credited to your [heavenly] account...and my God will meet all your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus!" [Philippians 4:17 and 19, NIV]

And that is the Truth...we can be confident in this - just as Paul was - that in the midst of every trial, every storm, every test and every need...the Lord will provide according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus! I don't know "where" it is going to come from - but it is coming! For this is not about Doug, Kelly, Carter, Jordyn or Jackson! It is not about our homes, our jobs, our work, our communities, our organizations, our successes, our ministries, or our lives. It is about so much more...the Life, Death and Resurrection of our Lord and Savior - Christ Jesus - who endured the Cross of suffering, shame, betrayal, pain and disappointment...because of His Great Love for us! Let His Love, Light and Life shine brightly in your every thought and action!

Please, put your swords down - and know that God is Love and He is with us every step of the way! I ask that you cover Karen, the couple, and their family in prayer through this of transition in ministry and home! And stand firm on the promise that He is with us in the deepest of valleys and on the highest of mountains - and in every step of the journey in between! I say it again...Rejoice Always, and consider it pure Joy the trials and tribulations we will face! Walk by Faith...forget the past, and run towards the heavenly prize He is calling us to! Fix your eyes on Jesus, pursue the Holy Spirit, and walk according to the good, pleasing and perfect Will of our Heavenly Father! I don't how it is all going to work out...but HE does!

All Eyes on Jesus...

And thanks for enduring and walking through this with us!