Light of Life...

...When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” [John 8:12]

I can't say that there have not been dark moments over the last 6 months in this journey...but I do know, when we found ourselves in a moment of darkness with no direction, no energy, no peace, no hope - our eyes were not fixed on Jesus! When your walking through fire - or walking on water - the moment you look at the flames, the waves, the wind or the intensity of the storm...your eyes are off the light of Life and on yourself - and you will begin to sink...just as Peter did when walking on water!

And the Light of the World has powerfully guided us over the last 4 days - it has been intense, no doubt - and a roller coaster of emotion...but His Word is a lamp unto our feet, and a light unto His Path for our life! And In Him...is overwhelming Strength and Peace that surpasses all understanding!

Day 1: The Promise [Monday, November 30]

As Kelly and I waited for 3 hours in the pre-op area before the c-section...we were so encompassed by God's Peace and Grace, as we continue to "wait" in His Presence for His Promise! And His Promise was delivered at 11am!

Jackson weighed in at a 8lbs 15oz -and came out crying and fighting, but after a few seconds he was unable to sustain his breath and so they intubated immediately. We saw him for 15 seconds in the delivery room, before he was rushed to the NICU at Magee Women's Hospital. Within the hour he was transported to Children's Hospital - but not before one of the greatest and hardest moments of our lives. The transport team was able to bring Jackson to Kelly's bedside in the recovery room where she was able to touch him, and give him a kiss on the forehead before saying the hardest good-bye of our lives.

After Jackson arrived at Children's fluid began filling his lungs as the pressure increased in his left atrium - which was anticipated with the severity of his heart defect. He was rushed into surgery later that afternoon to open the arterial septum, which is the hole between the left and right atrium. After two hours of surgery - the great news was delivered by Dr. Kruetzer and Dr. Munoz that the intervention was "optimal", as his vitals and pressures immediately improved and continued to increase throughout the night, while mommy and daddy put in a very un-restful night!

Day 2: The Stretch...

Tuesday was truly a day of stretching, molding, shaping and preparing! As Kelly recovered in Magee Women's Hospital, and Jackson recovered in Children's CICU - daddy was stretched, pulled, and juggled in every way! I felt like ship being tossed in the midst of the stormiest sea...and the best moment of our day - was when we had the opportunity for devotion and prayer time alone. It was a day of stretching...but it was a day of strengthening as well! Jackson continued to show great signs of improvement, as they put together a gameplan for getting him of many of the medicines and support over the next week. Kelly had the opportunity to take a deep breath and gain some strength as she rested!

Day 3: The moments that take your breath away...

Today was packed full of so many incredible moments, following a good night of sleep! Kelly was ready to be discharged. I took Carter and Jordyn in to see Mommy in the morning - only to find her dressed and ready to go! The four of us went over to see Jackson for the very first time...and oh what a moment! It was so amazing to watch the compassion and care of Carter! His eyes never left his baby brother, as he tried to figure out all the tubes and iv's, and what was going on. We had prepared him - and he did extremely well...but the only question Bubba could ask at 5 years old was, "Daddy-he is coming home soon, right?" Now Jordyn...she just kept saying "Baby, Baby, my Baby!" It was hilarious...but awesome all at the same time.

As for mommy though...it was hard, and there was no way she was leaving his side! To see the love Kelly has for our children, continues to break me! I have never seen Kelly so intense, so loving, so driven to hold, touch or care for her baby!

Life is measured by the moments that take our breath away...and the moment that truly did today was the moment of Jackson's first breath. After the kids were in and gone...the doctors came to us and said it is time! Time to take the tube out, and get Jackson off the ventilator. I will never forget watching him fight for life when they flipped the switch and turned off the ventilator. It was amazing! He struggled and fought as he wondered what just happened! He had not taken a breath on his own since delivery, and did not know that he needed to...but after a few minutes, he figured out what to do - and all of his vitals regained their status and the tube was out within the hour!

It was an exhausting day and we knew that we needed to get our rest...so we headed home for what seemed to be the longest night of our lives!

Day 4: The Hold

How Marvelous, How Wonderful is our Savior's Love for Us...is all I could sing today! For Better is One Day in His Courts than thousands elsewhere! And today held one of the greatest moments of our lives. All morning the nurses and doctors struggled to keep Jackson's heart rate under 190 beats per minute. They wanted it in the 150-160 range...and tried everything they could to get it there. Joanne, one of the Doctors on Jackson's surgery team who we immediately connected with a couple of weeks ago as she took us on our tour [another God story], stopped in to see how Kelly was doing, while she was out of the room. When I shared she was struggling a little this morning, Joanne told the nurses to make sure Kelly had the chance to hold Jackson. I, including the nurses, were stunned! We were told it would be weeks before we had the chance to hold him...but, when Kelly walked back into the room, the nurses had the room ready to go - and Jackson was placed into Kelly's arms for the first hold! Not only were the tears of joy flowing...but immediately Jackson's heart rate dropped 40 beats per minute, as he calmed down and fell into a deep asleep! For the hour and half that Kelly held him - his heart rate stayed in the mid 140's - low 160's! It was so awesome...and all the doctors and nurses were amazed! So as I sat there watching Kel and Jackson for the first time united...I just sat back and wept, as the Praise and Worship music filled the room [which, also led to some great conversation about God and church with the nurses!]

It has been intense...and there have been many moments of struggle over the last 4 days...but the moments that define Life continue to shine bright through the Light of the World! God is with us, and He is by our side...and holding us in ways we have never experienced! Today - worship Him! Praise His Name for He Alone is Worthy to be Praised!

Thank you for all your emails, txts, wall postings on facebook, prayers and encouragements, and I promise to update this blog as much as possible - and when possible - but right now, it is all eyes on Jesus, as I focus on Kel, Carter, Jordyn and our new little "big man"!

Have an awesome day...and let His Light shine bright through you today!

All Eyes on Jesus!